Final Reflections and a Big Hug for India

Yesterday I took my last malaria pill, the mosquito bites have healed and the scar on my leg is still visible to remind me that I was there.  I still feel like my head is somewhat in India.  She has entered my dreams many times since I have returned.  It has been a month plus one day since I arrived home from this culmination of experiences that have touched my heart in so many different ways.  I have never had something affect me so deeply.  I find myself getting emotional about certain memories as I have shared them with others.  Many have asked to hear of my experiences and I have found some of them hard to vocalize.  How do you sum up everything in a short conversation?

India.  She has changed me.  She has stripped me to the raw core and rebuilt me into a person who sees and feels things differently.  By removing me from the walls I hide behind and exposing me to children that are happy with the simple things in life, people who bravely deal with severe medical issues and allowing me to help in serving them, it has filled my soul. I feel I have been hugged and kissed by her.

She has made me fall in love with my daughter even more than I was before through witnessing her serving others with a heart of compassion.  As I watched Quincy share a smile or a laugh with someone who doesn't communicate in the same language, it was evident that through her body language they could feel her love translate.   As she washed the feet and took off bandages of those that are ailing physically, I felt  she was walking in the footsteps of our Savior.  I loved seeing her kind and gentle ways with the children at Rising Star.  I witnessed her many times holding a little one, playing Ring-around-the- Rosy or simply making a young lady feel special by words she shared.  She gave her whole self to India and made my mother's heart overflow with pride.  Shortly, four days, after this powerful experience, she has now taken her next step into adulthood. She has moved to Utah to attend BYU.  I miss her and know I have to share her with her new life. I admire my daughter for who she is and how she stands tall.  I have no doubt, she will go on to contribute so much good to this world.    

India may be dirty but the beauty I felt while present was so evident.  The beauty of living simply.  We don't need much to be happy.  The determination I see in the faces of children who desperately want to achieve their dreams and who easily open their hearts up to everyone was inspiring.  I was a part of and witnessed people who had come from our country, left their lives behind and gave of themselves 100 percent. 

Through collective effort of many volunteers throughout the summer we put in 22 bathrooms and septic systems for one of the colonies.  That is some teamwork.  I didn't once see anyone give less than they had.  What I did see, was people who deeply cared for others and walked the talk.  

I went on this journey with no expectations but only to support my daughter in her choice of a senior trip.  I wasn't on a spiritual journey of discovery to find myself.  I wasn't at a crossroads in my life.  I just had the desire to serve without the distractions of life.  I had always wanted to do something like this...be able to serve in full capacity and leave everything behind. 

 I have always envied those missionaries from our church that go away for two years and get to throw themselves into a world of service.  I had always felt that I wouldn't get this chance until I retired and Russ and I went on some type of a mission.  This was icing on the cake to do this at an earlier time while young (I don't know if you call this young, but I will) and healthy (for a 45 year old).  This time away has given me a small snapshot into what a  missionary must feel when he returns to regular life.

  After experiencing a third world country, I have felt a little disconnected, reminiscent and a bit saddened by how materialistic and entitled my society is.  I notice the good things in our lives but I also notice some of the things that are missing too.  We are quickly losing the relationship piece through busy and media filled lives.  That is something that stands out in my mind.  I want to slow down and enjoy the simple things.  I will travel and do something like this again.  Until then I will find ways to incorporate service into my life more often at a local level.

Christ has preached many times to lose ourselves in service.  He has taught that our lives will be enriched and blessed while in the service of others.  My petty daily problems seem so small when I am in the service of others.  Service fills the heart and feeds the soul. 

 I like this quote I recently read that says “To the world you may be just one person, but to one person you may be the world.” -- Brandi Snyder.  This really sums up how I feel about service.  You don't have to go to another country or do huge projects, it is in the way you live.  It is making those moments in our day make a difference in someone elses.  What happens is it comes full circle and shapes us into our best selves.

  Service should be part of the tapestry of our lives.  This experience has strengthened my testimony in loving others whether they live here or across another border, what station they are in life or whether the language spoken is the same.  Through our actions we show love.  It can break down barriers and heal our world.  Love has no borders.  We are all a part of the human race.       

I have made a promise to India that I will make it back.  I have new daughters to visit.  The Tamilarasi girls have taken my heart as hostage.  India has shown me who she is and I have embraced her as she is.

TII and India Eyes...What do these two phrases mean?

There are two phrases that still resonate in my mind after returning from Rising Star.  The first one is TII, which meant This is India.  When we would see things that just don’t quite make sense from a westerner’s point of view, this was said with a shrug of the shoulders.  It was when we had random power outages for short spurts of time daily throughout the day.   Sometimes in the evening you might be in the middle of a bucket shower and be standing butt (buck) naked in complete darkness saying this.

Maybe it would be said when we were driving zigzag down the road to avoid the worshipped cows.  Other times you might say this when you see a family of six on one motorcycle with the lady sitting side saddle in her sari while holding her little one. 

 You might find yourself uttering this phrase when you see hundreds of exposed power lines acting as a canopy over a city.  You might say this when you are bombarded with beggars selling you trinkets and many just wanting money.  It is things that just are and probably won’t change.  They are accepted and just part of the experience of being in India.

 The concept of arranged marriages baffled me, especially for those that are marrying their first cousins.  One of our house moms is sadly accepting this fate although she is intelligent enough to know that her future children may be affected by this and ostracized by society.  She is doing it only to please her parents and have their support.  Special needs children are accepted about as well as a leprosy affected person.  I refused to say TII to this as it should change.  The treatment of our leprosy affected patients broke my heart and it didn’t make sense.  Many of these cases wouldn’t have advanced if society attitudes and the road blocks that are put in front of these people didn’t exist.  I refuse to say TII to this as it has to change for Hansen’s Disease to be abolished.

The other phrase I have thought of often now and throughout the trip was India Eyes.  India Eyes means to try to overlook a lot of the things that appear dysfunctional, dirty or disorganized and look above it and find the beauty of the country.  This concept was revisited frequently by the coordinators and helped me to find the beauty in India.

  I found myself admiring the beautiful women in their colorful saris overlooking the garbage, cow manure and dirt they were walking on or stepping over.  I found myself noticing the raw beauty of the busy, colorful markets or fruit stands.  I found myself noticing the country’s landscape full of orange flowered trees and people herding goats and cows. I smiled when I saw happy, uniformed children making their way to school in the morning. 

 I noticed the beautiful smiles and lovely dark skin with gold jewelry adorning the women’t faces.  I enjoyed seeing people do the head bobble in agreement with a smile as you asked a question.  Instead of nodding they have a way of loosely moving their head in this manner. I basked in the glory of the kindness shown to me and to one another from all walks of life.  Many with so little would give this rich, by their means, westerner the shirt off their back.  “Vannakum” not only means hello but “Do you have enough to eat?” 

 It was refreshing to see children so present in their surroundings and not plugged in to technology. 

 I was constantly amazed at how people were so happy with so little.  Some of the patients had so many health challenges but managed to serve me by making me smile and inspire me with their courage to press on. 

The children and patients gratitude pulled at my heartstrings.

India eyes took over the longer I was present in India. India eyes will always stay with me as I share and explain to others of the experiences I have had in this rich, colorful country.  India and its people have left me changed on the outside and forever deep inside my soul.   

A Kaleidoscope of People

The people of India have captured my heart.  I have always enjoyed observing people in busy places.  Malls are good for this.  State Fairs tend to bring out some unusual people.  Even Walmart can be quite interesting.   We are a fascinating looking species, each one being unique in look, walk and dress.  India has fed my fascination in every way.  Its a busy place, lots of people, colorful saris, different religious attires, raw living, endless accessories on lovely dark skin and hair.  Here is a kaleidoscope of what I got to view during my three weeks in India.  This is dedicated to those that love to people watch just like myself.

 

 

 

 

I love the colorful, busy people of India.